Ok, this post may be a bit weird, but it was born in the middle of the night while I was scribbling on notepad pages in a Howard Hughes-esque trance. Besides reworking the budget, scribbling out a "to do" list for the upcoming month, and making a new list for the library, I sometimes think up ideas for the old blog. Silly things come to me and I say, "Ooo, that's not bad. I'd like to know that about someone ..."
99.9% of the time, I don't actually remember the ideas I come up with, but this morning after a whopping two hours of sleep, I did!
It's called ... "The One Thing." I'm going to list ten questions of ten things, ten favorites, ten tips, oh, you'll see below. All I ask in return is if you're visiting you do one of these Memes yourself and let me know about it OR if you're really short on time, just put a couple of your "one things" here because these are the things I'd like to know about you. (each question was written with a particular blogger in mind) And if you'll try a one thing of mine, hey, even better, I'd love to know and I'll tell you the same if/when I do. Whatever floats your boats, participation is up to you, optional, but could be fun. (below find the questions without answers, for ease of cutting and pasting, then mine all filled out below it)
The One Thing
1. If you could recommend only one book for others to read, what would it be and why?
2. What is your one favorite song? Why?
3. What is the one thing that is the biggest time saver in your life?
4. What is one gadget you couldn't live without and why?
5. If you could recommend one film for others to see, what would it be and why?
6. What is the one cure or preventative measure you believe in and for what ailment?
7. What is the best advice you've ever received and from whom?
8. If you could introduce the entire world to just one band/musical artist, who would it be and why?
9. If you could convince others you meet or know of one thing, what would it be?
10. What do you believe is one of the greatest ways of wasting money and how do you combat it?
My One Things
1. If you could recommend only one book for others to read, what would it be and why?A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving. I love the classics, love Russian authors, serious literature, but this novel from the 1980's is THE BEST WRITTEN, has THE BEST surprise ending, and is the ONLY book that ever made me weep so hard, I couldn't catch my breath. I've re-read it (just this month again), cried every time, and marvelled over the absolute brilliance of the writing itself. It's a life changing book you take with you for life.
2. What is your one favorite song? Why?The Turtles, Happy Together. Gorgeous voice, melodic, and makes me smile.
3. What is the one thing that is the biggest time saver in your life?Pre-planning. Keeping a daily schedule done at least one week in advance, which includes menus.
4. What is one gadget you couldn't live without and why?My Sonicare electric toothbrush. I've had expensive toothbrushes before, rechargeable and battery operated, but this one is simply the best. I used to be a dental assistant. I know a thing or two about clean teeth. I'll never switch.
5. If you could recommend one film for others to see, what would it be and why?Fight Club with Brad Pitt and my favorite, Edward Norton. Apart from the brilliant acting, there are a million and one quoteable quotes in this movie and in my modest opinion, a whole heckuva lot of wisdom. Such as, "You don't own your stuff. Your stuff owns you."
6. What is the one cure or preventative measure you believe in and for what ailment?Water. Mainly for headaches since the lion's share of headaches ares due to dehydration. Basically your brain is shrinking (drying up), pulling up from your skull, and causing you pain. One good clue that you're dehydrated? Thirst. A properly hydrated body doesn't get thirsty. Water's also great for keeping the liver and kidneys in proper working order, keeping away urinary tract infections, and keeping skin soft and blemish-free, to name just a few.
7. What is the best advice you've ever received and from whom?Once in the early 90's when bitching about the drudgery of homekeeping, my friend Helene told me she looked at keeping house and especially cooking as ways of showing her family how much she loves them. I never forgot that and it really did change my life. I still think of her words any time I don't particularly feel like cooking or whatever. I also think of how hard my husband works for us and how he never takes a day off, so why should I?
8. If you could introduce the entire world to just one band/musical artist, who would it be and why?The White Stripes. A two person powerhouse. Jack White is so incredibly gifted musically and lyrically ... plus there's not enough real rock left in the world.
9. If you could convince others you meet or know of one thing, what would it be?Going green and caring about the planet doesn't make you a crazy earthy crunchy hippie freak, but a responsible human being who not only is saving our world, but saving money as well. You are responsible for your private sector. Why not make the best of it?
10. What do you believe is one of the greatest ways of wasting money and how do you combat it?Besides shopping for things you want instead of what you need, it would definitely be cleaning products (especially laundry detergent). They have one for everything nowadays when you could just make your own for pennies from natural ingredients that are more effective and kill germs without killing the planet ... and instead of a cupboard full of junk, you'd have 5 products in total. Just 5.
As I get older, I find myself actually growing up. It's a strange thing, really. I'm not the same girl I once was and yet, this makes me feel better somehow.
I won't be allowed into Neverland anymore, but hey, I actually watch some bits of the news now instead. It has to be the BBC news, but still, I am paying attention. I even feel like I'm perhaps learning global events.
Then there's vanity, a long ago faded concept. I like to look clean and pressed. I don't care about all the other frivolties I once worshipped. Fashion, dyeing my hair, designers ... that's not for me. I'm not quite into polyester yet, but I will say cotton is my staple.
One of the last things to go for me was holding a grudge. I find myself not really able to do this anymore. On the Internet or if I haven't met a person in real life, forget it ... there is no way I'll hold onto bad feelings. I can't waste that kind of mental stuff on someone I truly don't know. Against family members who have seriously done me wrong, I now end up truly feeling sorry for them instead. I do the usual shrug or laugh. I'll make jokes about the worst of situations. I'll apologize if I've been the offender. Then move on.
I do, however, have one person who truly bothers me ... and that is still my daughter's boyfriend. I don't have hateful feelings against anyone in the world except for this kid. And I don't know why. I mean, he's actually a well-adjusted kid. A scholar and athlete. Good manners. Not a serial killer. All right, I don't hate him, I don't want him to die horribly, but a big part of me wants him to just go away. Even though my daughter can't see a lot of him due to my strictness, it still feels like too much.
So I tell myself, I am aging. I am approaching 40 (someday). I have become more peaceful, more centered, more healthy, but I have the one major thorn in my side. It's not so bad, but I would love to turn this around as well. I would love to have no thorns, only bluebirds and sunflowers. This would be lovely.
Thinking of all this stuff got me curious to see if it's actually just normal. Any of you Bloggers out there holding a grudge? Do you hold grudges at all? Do you find yourself growing older and growing up or just the opposite? I'd love to know the specifics. Either way, have a fantastic weekend, One and All!
Pssst, you. Yeah, YOU. The woman standing in front of me at the convenient store. I don't know how to tell you this. I mean ... I know we just met and all, but ... well, let me just say that your outfit is smashing. Very feminine. Much better than the cargo shorts and plaid sneaks I happen to be wearing, but you see, I believe it's my duty to say something and there's really no other way to put it, so here goes ... you stink.
No, no, no, don't overreact. Don't take it to heart. C'mon, save those tears for a real tragedy. It's just that, well, in an effort to smell nice, you've overdone it just a tad. Perhaps, by half a bottle or so. Now, now, Little Buckaroo, don't despair.
Unfortunately, perfume manufacturers don't give buyers a serving size guide, but don't worry, I can help a sister out. It's what I live for, after all.
First off, let me just explain something about your nose that you may not have heard. It's AMAZING. Oh no, believe me, I'm not gushing. Just listen to this: your nose is, well, beyond being sick of your perfume, your nose is trying its best to keep you safe from harm, no matter how much you abuse it. The nose actually stops perfume wearers, or bathers, such as yourself, from smelling their perfume. This is so you can go throughout your day and night smelling other things like flowers in a neighbor's garden, dinner at your favorite restaurant, or even something as silly as smoke (the big clue that your house may be burning down while you're in bed spritzing away).
While you spray and slather, your nose readjusts itself to tune out the every day fragrance onslaught so it can stay on alert. So, even if YOU aren't smelling your perfume, the rest of us, the fragrance free and perfumed us, are. In fact, we're smelling it strongly enough to burn our lungs and make our eyes water. Strong enough for our own noses to tell us to back away and perhaps sneeze, cough or throw up in our mouth a little ... all in preparation for the headache that we know is on the way. Oh, it's a good time. Good time.
Well, now you know a new little factoid. Hopefully, this information will keep you from re-applying during the day -- in the car, at the office, in the bathroom. Just know a couple of dabs on the neck, one spray from the bottle and only ONCE a DAY is the absolute MOST you should be using of any perfume . I'm not your husband, your lover, or even your good lesbian friend. I'd rather smell the convenient store pizza, thank you very much.
Anywho, now that we've had this heart-to-heart, now that I think we've moved a bit closer to one another, might I also convince you to spend a little more for that which you love? While I adore a bargain as much, if not more than, the next girl, a personal scent should at least cost more than a tenner. This has always been my personal belief.
Well, off you go then, Nostril Offender. Hoping to breathe easier the next time we meet. Do not worry your scent will linger on and on and on.
(inspired by actual woman at Fastrac convenient store who may have collapsed my right lung)
Although I'm not the type of Blogger to check counter stats, I am the type of who checks on visitors. Not all the time, in fact to be honest, perhaps once every couple of months. I'm really not anal about it. Who has the time?
But I find it odd when "regulars" visit here, more than once, without commenting. NOT if they've commented previously on a post, but only if they haven't ... at all. Especially if I have sent them word to stop on by, to say it's been a while, or for whatever other reason.
It's something I find perplexing. Why visit and not comment? Why lurk? Even daily as the stats sometimes show? Why comment on some posts and not others?
I mean, I've done it. Gone to a Blog, read the post, and not commented. Reasons for the transgression:
1.) Blogger I read hadn't visited me in a while.
2.) Interrupted in the middle of post.
3.) Mostly number one.
It's just one of those weird things I was thinking of this morning while I was forcing myself to get up and begin the day. Along with congratulating myself on being OVER 3 WEEKS SMOKE FREE! I believe I have officially kicked the habit. Now to obliterate viewing who's reading my blog.
P.S. Weeding the "Blogs I Read" category. Subtracting and adding this week.
I changed my original post for today because once again, I took #5 in an online writing contest. We were given a photograph of a dense forest with sunlight coming down in rays off in the distance as our inspiration. (would have posted it, but it won't show up so you can see it here) Every piece is limited to 250 words.
I was genuinely surprised as my little story wrote itself. I'm not much of a re-writer. I lack the discipline to start something knowing how it will turn out. My stories kind of dictate themselves and I scamper furiously to write it all down. I read it, correct grammar and spelling to the best of my ability, and send it off.
I had a lot of fun doing this contest though. It gave me a nice wake up to the summer and the reading was really terrific. There were more than a few that sucked me right in, including our own Mr. Schprock. I really like his darker stuff, but won't put a link up without his permission. (you can find him at the site though and it's worth the trip)
I was #37, writing under the penname, Ann Ostrander: The Truth
And for those hating to click on links like me, I put the 250 word short story below.
The Truth
by Ann Ostrander
“If it hurts at all, just stop me,” Brian whispered. Even with the thick plaid blanket underneath us, the forest floor felt damp. He fumbled with the condom as I undressed.
We didn’t kiss or touch each other. I wasn’t comfortable with that. Weird, I know. Sex before any of the things my friends did first. Maybe it would come later.
“Are you all right?” Brian asked, positioning himself between my legs. I nodded, wishing I still wore a bra as his eyes darted in that direction.
“If it hurts…” he breathed, while fumbling between my legs, “Make sure to tell me.”
But it didn’t. I felt pressure and his hips pushing against mine. I waited for the pain my mother had told me about with her first time, but there was none. Just another lie to scare me … to keep me ‘pure.’ Mom. I couldn’t think of her now.
I opened my eyes and concentrated on a shaft of light penetrating the canopy. Brian groaned and shook. It’s over. I’m fourteen and it’s happened. He moved his mouth towards mine. I snapped my head to the side.
“Still no kissing, Nessa?” he laughed. I smiled and kept my eyes on the light.
Three weeks later and Mom still doesn’t know. She always said she would, but that wasn’t true either. Every time she asks if I’m still being ‘chaste,’ I tell her, “Mom, I haven’t even made out with a boy yet.” At least I’m telling the truth.
(Personal thank you to Jason Evans ... for all the hard work and a terrific contest.)
